Elon Musk's xAI Holdings to Raise $20 Billion, Because Why Not?

In a move that shocked absolutely no one, Elon Musk's xAI Holdings is reportedly trying to scoop up a casual $20 billion in fresh funding. Because when you're the guy who sends cars into space and buys social media platforms on a whim, what's another $20 billion between friends?

According to sources who probably have a direct line to Musk's Twitter DMs, this funding round could value xAI at a cool $120 billion. That's right, folks. For the price of a small country, you too can own a piece of Musk's latest 'totally not a money pit' venture.

What does xAI actually do? Great question. If you figure it out, please let the rest of us know. Rumor has it, it's a combination of AI and social media, because nothing says 'innovative tech' like mashing two buzzwords together and seeing what happens.

This potential funding round would be the second-largest private funding round ever, trailing only behind OpenAI's 'we made ChatGPT and now everyone's scared' round. It's a tight race in the 'who can burn the most investor cash' Olympics, and Musk is going for gold.

Investors are reportedly 'cautiously optimistic', which is code for 'we know this is insane but FOMO is a powerful drug'. Meanwhile, the rest of us are just sitting here, wondering if we should start a GoFundMe to buy a single share.

Stay tuned for the next episode of 'As Musk's Bank Account Turns', where we find out if $20 billion is enough to finally buy Mars.