Anthropic News

Browse our collection of satirical articles about Anthropic

OpenAI Eats Rivals for Breakfast: Enterprises Flock to AI Overlord Like It's Black Friday

OpenAI's enterprise adoption is skyrocketing, leaving rivals in the dust and possibly in the unemployment line. Discover how the AI giant is becoming the undisputed champion of the tech world.

2025: The Year U.S. Semiconductors Decided to Throw a Drama-Filled Party

Dive into the hilariously chaotic world of the 2025 U.S. semiconductor market, where drama, shortages, and AI ambitions collide in the most absurd ways imaginable.

Anthropic's AI for Science Program: Because Researchers Love Free Stuff More Than Lab Mice

Anthropic's new AI for Science program offers researchers $20,000 in API credits, because nothing says 'supporting science' like a glorified coupon.

Apple and Anthropic's New AI: Because Coders Need More Vibes and Less Work

Apple and Anthropic are bringing vibes to coding with their new AI platform. Because what programmers really need is more zen and less functionality.

Claude AI Now Connects to Your Toaster: Anthropic's Latest 'Integration' Madness

Anthropic's Claude AI now connects to everything but your sanity. Toasters, fridges, and even your grandma's flip phone are now part of the AI revolution. Welcome to the future.

Anthropic to Gov: 'Cool AI Chip Restrictions, But Can We Add Some RGB Lighting?'

Anthropic humorously suggests adding RGB lighting and 'No China' stickers to AI chips in response to U.S. export controls, because why not make the tech race flashier?
Apr 25, 2025

Anthropic's Claude Code vs. OpenAI's Codex CLI: A Tale of Two Coding Tools and One Very Sad Developer

A satirical take on the showdown between Anthropic's Claude Code and OpenAI's Codex CLI, featuring legal drama, developer woes, and a hamster on a wheel.
Apr 24, 2025

Anthropic's New AI 'Model Welfare' Program: Because Even Robots Need a Hug Sometimes

Anthropic's new AI 'model welfare' program explores if robots need hugs too, in a move that's either groundbreaking or just really, really funny.

Claude the Creepy: Your New AI Overlord Now Snoops Through Your Emails

In a move that absolutely no one saw coming (except everyone), Anthropic has decided that what the world really needs is an AI that can rifle through your personal correspondence like a nosy neighb...

Claude's $200 'Max' Subscription: Because Your Chatbot Deserves the Champagne of AI

In a move that shocked absolutely no one, Anthropic has decided that if OpenAI can charge an arm and a leg for their AI, so can they. Enter Claude Max, the new $200-a-month subscri...

AI Charitable Bots: Now Begging for Change So You Don’t Have To!

In a world where your toaster judges your life choices, it was only a matter of time before AI started hitting us up for spare change. Enter Sage Future, the nonprofit that’s decid...

Claude for Education: Because Students Need Another Excuse to Not Read the Textbook

In a groundbreaking move that will surely revolutionize the way students avoid doing actual work, Anthropic has unveiled its latest masterpiece: Claude for Education. This new tier...

AI Models: Because Humans Are Too Last Century

In a world where asking Siri to set a timer is considered a peak human achievement, AI models are here to remind us just how inadequate we really are. Confused about which AI model to use?<...

Mar 21, 2025

Claude's Web Search: Sponsored by Brave, Brought to You by the Ghost of Internet Explorer

In a groundbreaking move that has left the tech world both bewildered and mildly amused, Anthropic has decided to outfit its AI-powered chatbot, Claude, with a web search feature. But here's the tw...

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