AI Now Does Your Job: Conveyor's Latest Invention Leaves Security Teams Questioning Their Existence

In a groundbreaking announcement that has security professionals everywhere updating their LinkedIn profiles to 'Open to Work', Conveyor, the 4-year-old startup that apparently doesn't believe in human suffering, has secured a whopping $20 million Series B from SignalFire. Their crime? Creating an AI that automates the soul-crushing process of vendor security reviews and RFPs.

"We took one look at the endless hellscape of security questionnaires and said, 'Let there be code'," boasted a Conveyor spokesperson, presumably while lounging on a pile of money. "Now, instead of spending weeks drowning in paperwork, our AI can drown in it for you. You're welcome."

The technology, dubbed 'The Harbinger of Unemployment' by early testers, promises to reduce the time spent on vendor assessments from 'an eternity' to 'the blink of an eye'. "It's like magic, but sadder," commented one security engineer, who asked to remain anonymous lest the AI replace them next.

But how does it work, you ask? Imagine a robot, but instead of doing cool robot things like fighting aliens or making coffee, it fills out forms. Lots of forms. Using the power of AI (which we're pretty sure is just a fancy term for 'computer magic'), Conveyor's system can apparently understand, analyze, and respond to security questionnaires with the enthusiasm of a caffeine-deprived intern.

"The best part? It never complains," added the spokesperson. "No 'I need a raise', no 'This is boring', just pure, unadulterated productivity. Take that, humans."

Reactions from the security community have been mixed, ranging from 'This is amazing' to 'I've made a huge mistake getting into this field'. One vendor risk manager was overheard saying, "I used to think my job was secure. Now I'm not so sure." Meanwhile, the AI continues to work tirelessly, unaware of the existential crisis it's causing.

In related news, Conveyor has hinted at their next project: an AI that attends meetings for you. "Because let's face it, those could use some automation too," they quipped. Humanity, meanwhile, is left to ponder its place in a world where even complaining about work is being outsourced to machines.